Anonymous Q: Have you ever been to shy to tell a girl how you feel?
Youko’s A: Uh oh, watch out, time for TRUTH BOMBS! Of course I have been too shy/too afraid and if any guy says they have not, they’re lying. There are social theories that on a primal level, one of the main reasons men feel such fear when approaching and showing interest in a woman is that they don’t know what other men that woman is currently involved with. It’s an outdated theory that carries over from very early times (think cavemen), when if another man saw you with his woman, he could and would kill you. So the theory claims that it isn’t “fear of rejection” that terrifies us men, but it instead is a deep-seated primal fear of DEATH by the hands of another man for interfering with his female-related affairs. Crazy, huh?
Of course, the same kind of idea holds true for women, but in a much different way. It is also theorized that women have a similar kind of primal fear to get sexually involved with a man because she might be abandoned with child. The idea of a man leaving her to bear and raise her child alone is too much of a risk for a woman to take, especially in those very early times where a woman needed a man to protect her and hunt for food for her and her child. While the woman doesn’t NEED to be protected in today’s society like in those caveman times, the overall concept carries over into modern day much stronger than the male primal fear.
Of course, these things haven’t been fully proven, but they certainly are enlightening. It’s all part of what makes relationships so fascinating…and also a little frightening.
Plus, my current situation is plagued by the “she’s already got a boyfriend” and the “I’m graduating soon anyway” dilemmas. But hey, what can you do.
You can ask me these kinds of questions and more anonymously for me to answer at http://www.formspring.me/smynyouko
